My baby is a big girl

It's official No longer can I try and deny it.We are well on our way to having an "official toddler." Emma will be two in less than a month. I feel like I haven't had a "baby-baby" in such a long time though. She has been this big girl for a while now.

Emma gets into everything. Seriously. Especially those things we explicitly tell her NOT to get into. Those are her favorite. Of course. haha

At one point I tried to jot down every new word Emma said. I WANTED to be one of those moms who could tell you exactly what words were learned at 14 months, 15 months, 18 months, 2 years... But the fact of the matter is Emma learned way too many words way too fast. She knew how to put sentences together, form complete and complex thoughts, making actual decisions from so early on that it was impossible to keep up with her. Granted, the decisions she made weren't overly ridiculous, but still. I let her decide what she wanted to wear---within reason...aka I presented options I felt were appropriate and let her choose. Sometimes I would pick out 2 outfits for her and she would end up mixing the shirt and pants but hey, she liked it so I didn't fight her.

She chooses her own sippy cups when she is thirsty. When we moved, I made sure there was a bottom cabinet allocated to her plates, bowls and cups. So when she tells me "Mommy I firsty." I tell her to grab a cup. She goes right to her cabinet, squats down, thinks about which one she wants, and then brings it to me. That's amazing for a not-yet-two-year-old.

This kid. She's a nut though, I tell ya. She loves to sing and dance. She loves Mickey Mouse Clubhouse and is now branching out to watch Octonauts, Sophia the First, and Doc McStuffins without a fuss. She still isn't overly fond of Jake & the Neverland Pirates, but that's fine too. She has a personality with definitive likes and dislikes.

She also knows what her "schedule" is. She knows Mondays are "Mamaw's days." Tuesday and Thursdays she knows she's goin to "Nonna's." And every Wednesday she wakes up and asks if her "An Sheh-yee" is coming over. I didn't know kids her age could pick up on that. Like pick up on what day of the week it is.

She knows how to count to 13. Sometimes she skips 5, 6, 7, 8--as in she will go "one, two, free, foe, nine, ten, eyeven, telve, tirteen..."; but if you ask her "What comes after 4?" She will tell you "5." And so on. She is learning her colors. She knows bue, geen, and wed (blue, green, & red). Usually. Those are about a 75% chance of her getting it right. Sometimes she knows yeh-yo (yellow), ohwange (orange), puhpull (purple). She doesn't understand white or black yet.

She gets the concept of names too. You ask her "What's your name?" And she says tells you. You ask her "How old are you gonna be?" She says "I gonna be TWO!" and holds up both of her pointer fingers! Now that's funny! I've even asked her what my name is. She says "Peeka" because my last name sounds like that. Or sometimes she says her dad's last name, then stops, acts like she's thinking about it, smiles (smirks really), and says "Nooooo. Is PEEKA!" Smartalec!

She's also a bit of an athlete. She can hit a ball off a tee to about 20 feet away. She can toss with serious accuracy. She manages to hit her target 99% of the time!! She loves footballs and basketballs and softballs... She loves to come up behind you and go "Momma-Kesh!" (MommaCatch) Then chuck a football right at the dead center of your chest!

But she's also such a girly-girl. She wants to wear dresses all the time. Seriously, I have to force her to wear shorts and pants. She wants her skirts and dresses. So weird for me because I used to have to be forced to wear dresses! But this kid loves 'em. I have said for a while now that she will be the girl on the softball field in full hair and make-up! haha

I can't believe she's going to be two next month. Exactly 4 weeks from today, actually. And it will be her Golden birthday. 2 on the 2nd.

I love being her mommy. I love watching her with her Daddy. I love snuggling with her and singing and dancing with her. I love when I drop her off with her Mamaw/Papaw or Nonna/Poppa, or when her An Sheh-yee or An Kiki come visit her and seeing her play with them. It hurts sometimes that she is so okay with me leaving or when she loses it because I have to take her home, not gonna lie. But then I remember she knows she's loved from everyone. Every single person who has ever met her has liked her. Genuinely liked her. She says "HI!" to the people in stores and their faces always light up and they almost always say hi back.

I got lucky. I know it. I was smart enough to wait for the perfect guy for me, so I would have this perfect person to help grow and raise and mold and shape and teach... I get to be her mommy every day. And every day is a blessing.

SO MUCH

... has happened! I can't even believe it.

But before I delve into all of that, let me apologize for not keeping up with this blog better. I'm trying but we always have so much going on. And I have learned that being present in those moments are what truly matter most. So, that being said, while I will still try very hard to stay up to date on this, I will also be making sure that I don't let moments bypass me as I think of my next blog.

Okay, now back to the awesomeness that is MY LIFE! haha

First big thing: We moved! Yep. My boyfriend and I bought a house together. I have never owned my own home. I lived with my parents until college. Rented until I moved back in with my mom. Then I lived with Matt. So this was a massive step for us. To have this HUGE house with this HUGE meaning behind it.... We're in this together, you know? I mean, we've had so many good moments, so many memories at our old home, but this was a fresh start. Emma will be two soon and we wanted a bigger place to raise her. Our old home had a "past" to it that this home doesn't. This is just me and Emma and Emma's dad.

The house is gorgeous too. We fell in love with it right away. Even put an offer in on it. It was rejected at first because the bank accepted someoneelse's offer. So we looked at other places, contemplated those places, considered making offers on those places. But we kept this place in the memory bank. We would keep looking at it on the computer, pulling it up and revisiting the "shoulda, coulda, woulda's" of this place. After a few weeks, we noticed it was still listed as "open" so we put another offer in. And we got it!! We got the news right before we went on our family vacation in Disney. While there they needed more "stuff," so we scrambled then to make arrangements to get the bank the documents they needed.

Fast forward to April 24th. We closed on our dream home on that day. My boyfriend and I celebrated with a lunch date at Maggiano's--just the two of us. We picked out the colors together. We picked out the detail-stuff together....all of it.

We had our grandfather paint most of the house and take care of most of the cosmetic issues, but I will say my stepdad and I painted my room and Emma's room. I even painted most of the ceilings throughout the whole house! I ended up having to change a few room-colors after we started, but I am so happy with how the house looks. The whole family is in love with it! Emma can't get enough of it. She loves this place. Has called it her house since the start.

First floor:

• The first floor has a formal dining room and formal living room right in front. We call the FDR the "Beauty & the Beast Room" because of the color and the chandelier we bought. tee hee hee.
• We made the FLR Emma's playroom. She has so so many toys that we needed an entire room to house them! 
• Then there's the open kitchen and family room with a fire place. I love the fire place.. and the wall of bay windows in the family room. We still have some work to do in the kitchen, but it's all little things. Like painting the cabinets and putting an island in. 
• Then there's the laundry room right off the kitchen--leads to the garage. Have plans for a few changes for that room, but nothing that is a "has to be done right away" type thing. Nope. I love the mint color I chose for that room!! 
• The powder room on this floor is coral and I do mean CORAL! It's so bright and lovely. Honestly. I see that room and it makes me smile, it's so cheery!

The Second Floor:

• The upstairs has the bedrooms. Guest room, Emma's bathroom, office, Emma's room, then the master bed and bath. 
• Emma's room is pink and violet and ADORABLE! We have Mickey and Minnie decals on the wall and I think it's the most fun room for a toddler I've seen. Her bathroom is the same pink. 
• The master bedroom is grey and blue. Simple and soothing. I even have a reading nook in my room. :) It's so much fun. And the bathroom. It's HUGE! And the colors are peach and coral. And I think that might be another favorite room-color-choice combo. 
• Right now the office and the guest room are "neutral." I don't know how I want them to look, so I'm keeping them sort of bland for now. No point in doing something I don't love just to have to redo it later.

The basement is massive and finished. It has a storage room with built-in shelves. That room was one of two reasons I fell in love with this house.

The backyard. Oh geez. I love our backyard. Small patio but big enough for our table and chairs plus some set-up chairs where the family can all circle up and chat-chit. And Emma's swingset. This kid loves her swingset. It was the second thing that made me love the house. Emma is really into slides right now, so this was perfect for her. This may actually be the reason she loved the house from the start. haha Our yard isn't "massive" or anything but there are 4 houses side by side with open yards and each has the swingset. So all the kids can play together and just run from one yard to the next. I love it.

Since I have made this post incredibly long (much more so than I had intended), I'm going to wrap it up and end it now... With some pictures of the house as it is now! Enjoy!

Dining Room with "Beauty & Beast Chandelier"

Emma's Pink-chic bathroom

My Mint laundry room

 

 

 
 

Master bedroom with my reading nook! :)

Okay

So many Birthdays!

It's almost here! The weekend!! 

I know. They take forever to get here, but they always come, each week, so it shouldn't be such a surprise. But that's not the big deal. The big deal is this weekend is EXTREE-Special. This weekend all of my nieces and nephew (and a "cousin") will all be one year old! Holy Moly!!

That's right! I have the best luck in that my daughter--who is already 19 months old!-- has 4 cousins who are no more than 7 months younger than her! My twin niece and nephew turned one at the end of December and it was fun going to Wisconsin to celebrate with them. They are these adorable roly pollies who have seriously the biggest, happiest, and overal BEST smiles...EVER! I swear. My only nephew (to this point) is a tank of a boy but the biggest sweetheart ever. He loves to laugh and you love to hear him laugh. And when his grandparents get around him, he lights up and wants to play. I think he's going to be that football player you just inherently like because he's genuinely friendly. Sporty and  Friendly. The best combo!

My nephew Monty. Told you his smile was perfect!

His twin sister, my "oldest" niece, well she's like him and she's not. She is friendly but not one of those "I'm going to love everyone RIGHT AWAY!" types. No, she's more of a "let me study you and figure out how good a friends we are going to be" type. What I like to call "Southern." lol She's not mean or anything remotely like that, but she won't be fake either. She is kind and courteous if she doesn't know you but so tight and loving if she does. Kinda like me and her mom. My stepsister and I are A LOT alike and to see her daughter be like her is amazing. Anyways, my niece is incredible. She is definitely a care-giver. Even at their birthday party back in December, it seemed like she would randomly look around for her brother, make sure he was okay and having fun. When they were having their smash cakes, she wanted to share hers with him. Quietly perfect, that's my niece!

My oldest niece Amelia... aka "Melie"

Melie sharing her cake with Monty

We had a little break before the next "round," you know. Next up was my guy's cousin's little girl. She turned 1 earlier this week. Ellie is sort of like Monty and sort of like Melie. She LOVES to laugh and she LOVES her cousins. She isn't too sure about new people though. Ellie is sort of like Emma's little sister right now, which is great! They live really close to us so Emma gets to see Ellie AT LEAST once or twice a week, if not more. They fight like sisters: when Ellie has a toy, of course that's the one Emma wants to play with. If Emma has something Ellie knows is "hers" (aka, if she wants it), then she will "tell" Emma in no uncertain terms. It's adorable!! I love that Emma gets to be a big sister to her cousin, yet still get to enjoy being Mommy & Daddy's "only." Ellie is talking a little more each day and trying her darndest to walk. She is soo close! A favorite new memory is from her birthday dinner, when Ellie and Emma both asked to watch their beloved "Mimi" (Mickey Mouse Clubhouse). They were pointing things out on the TV, characters and such, and singing the songs together. It was such a beautiful moment.
**Side note: I also think it's fitting both girls have "classical" and "Austen-ian" names! Eleanor and Emma are both strong, independent, loving characters from my favorite author. Just seems kismet to me! :)

Ellie and her Smash Cake photo!

(Almost) Always the happy, smiley girl! 

My "youngest" niece" turns 1 this weekend. Vivi is just a pure joy. She is so smart and athletic. I mean, what other baby do you know--at 9/10 months--could figure out that if she kind of rocks her upper body back and forth on a swing, the swing will start to move?? That's insane! But that's Vivi. She is so sweet. Her hugs are amazing... maybe because she is so deliberate about who she gives them to. Seeing her with her mommy and daddy is like candy for the eyes. This little girl captures your heart quietly. And I don't think I have ever heard her cry, seen a pic of her crying, or heard tales of her crying. Really and truly a happy and easy going baby girl.

If I had to use Jane Austen's characters to describe my littl'uns, I guess it would be as follows:

• Monty: Well he is like Mr. Bingley. Funny and fun to be around. Everyone loves him. No one can find a bad thing to say about him. He makes and keeps friends because he is a genuine and true guy. He will lead the pack because he wants to experience everything fresh and new, and not because of some need to be first. His enjoyment of things comes from their simple pleasure and not from what he can gain. (Little philosophical for a toddler. LOL)
• Amelia: She reminds me so much of Jane Bennett. Which is weirdly perfect in that Mr. Bingely ends up with Jane Bennett. But anyways. Jane is always thinking well of others, looking out for her family. Quietly observant of what is going on around her. She is the rock of the family. She doesn't judge as quickly as Elizabeth, so people like her and want to be around her. She finds the good in people and doesn't throw herself into the spotlight (*cough, cough* Lydia!), 
• Ellie: I see Margaret Dashwood with her. Yeah, yeah, she's like 12 in the book but whatever. Margaret is neither completely fanciful nor completely family-focused. Margaret craves adventure; she wants to be able to do the things her older siblings can do. She doesn't care about the material things, more the experiences she can have. She is probably the most well-balanced of Jane Austen's characters, but then again, she is only 12! haha
• Vivi: I just keep thinking of Fanny Price. Yeah, she's shy and timid, but I wouldn't describe Fanny as "shrinking from notice." Nor would I say that about Vivi. They are quiet and determined. I once heard Fanny described more of "Horton" from "Horton Hatches an Egg": She sits there, unwavering and faithful. "Steadfastly virtuous" is another way to look at it. I think that is more appropriate for my littlest niece. She is never going to be a "Marianne" (flighty, quick to fall in love, carefree to a fault...) but she doesn't seem to need to be. She already seems like she is aware of who she is and accepting of it. Far better than some of us adults sometimes!

For my family reading this: How'd I do? Did I get close, you think? And for those of you who don't know each baby (maybe that's not the right word anymore?? EEK--TODDLER), did I paint a picture of their personality clearly? 

Somebody's Daughter... Somebody's Mother

The other day I watched my daughter sleep. It was early in the morning and I still had a little bit before I had to start getting ready for work, so I just brushed my fingers through her hair and watched her sleep. It was amazing. And somewhere in that time, I had a "moment": I was looking at someone's future mommy. Someday my little girl will look down at her baby and be filled with the same love I was at that moment.

The same love I have every day.

The same look and love that my mom had when she held me as a baby. And her mother to her, and her mother to her... It's probably been the same for every mother of a daughter for as far back as... well since the first daughter was born.

I haven't had a son, so I don't know what that feels like, but MAN! was that a powerful moment for me.

***
Mommies of little girls have this "whole 'nother thing" going on. We are mothers of mothers. We are the givers of life to those who will give life. We hold our daughters and love them with everything we have. But we know that someday someone will love them too and make them mommies. Someday--not today, but someday--we will be outranked by their son or daughter.

That makes me happy more than it makes me sad.

It makes me a little sad to know I will not always be her favorite person, or her most important person. I mean, yeah, I knew from the second I found out I was having a girl I was in for the biggest rollercoaster ride EVER! I knew she would "hate" me in her teenage years when I "just wouldn't understand," when I "just don't get it." Because yeah, I've never been there! haha I have dreaded those days since I heard "it's a girl," even knowing they are so far off in the future but will be here in the blink of an eye. So it's not like I ever expected to be her favorite person for her whole entire life or anything like that. But I gotta admit, it's different thinking all together to think about how there will be these other people who will love your child as-much-as-you-in-a-completely-different-way type thing.

Lawd I don't even know if this is making sense at this point!!

I'm a religious woman--not a church-goer but still religious--and I remember from my Sunday School days the scripture which says (paraphrased): "And one day he will leave his father and mother, and she will leave her father and mother, and they will join as one family." It's as it should be. And as it will be. And that makes me so very happy.

Eventually I know Emma will find someone to love her with every fiber in themselves. I know because that's how I feel about her daddy. From the second I saw him, I knew he was the end and beginning for me. No lie; from the very first second. I had to wait for our time to be the right time and at varying points over those years I was scared I might be wrong; but I wasn't. I have found the one and only person I am supposed to be with forever. I can't believe how lucky I am. But then again, I can. Because I know it wasn't luck for me and it won't be luck for Emma. She will find her Prince Charming, her Beast, her soul mate/other half/true love. She will find this person and build a life separate from us. She will become someone's mommy. And she will THEN, and maybe only then, know exactly how much I love her.

I love my mom but I don't think I ever "got" how much she loved me until I held Emma in my arms that very first time. And maybe even then I didn't really get it because each day I wake up I think how much more and differently I love my daughter.

I'm not special. Not really. I'm the same in the most basic ways possible as every mother before me. I love my child. I love her more than I love myself. I work to make her proud, to provide for her. I want to be the best for my child. That's it. Every single true mother is the same at the core. "Egg donors"--those people who give birth but aren't mothers, not really...well that's different. -----Staying positive now...

This was a very long, almost babbling post that may very well embarrass my daughter one day. But that's okay! Because that moment was such a heavy moment for me. "I am looking at someone's mommy." That's heavy!!  But still, it was the best moment of that day. To know with every bit of certainty that my daughter will be loved by her child. Maybe this is a tad (sarcastic much?) presumptuous, but that's just how I felt, how I feel.

I thanked God right then and there for giving me my daughter, and for the future children she can have.


**Side note: Before I get a whole bunch of responses about how she may not want children, how she may love someone who won't/can't give her children, how she may not be able to have children; I hear you. I hear the pain of those who can't conceive and those who struggle with their relationships being "different," etc. I'm not suggesting Emma MUST have children for me to love her or whatever. I'm simply sharing a moment I had with my daughter. And for that moment, my thoughts were as above. My mind felt cleared and empty and whole--maybe? I don't know what it was. I just wanted to share this moment with my friends and family as it was such a profound moment for me. I apologize here and now if I hurt or offend anyone, as that is NEVER my intention. Please take this post for what it is, at face value. Thank you.

New Adventures!

I tried to get this post together this past weekend, but didn't want to try and do it on my phone. That's a headache and just not worth it! So here we go, all new things with my little 'un!

We have had our first "parent involved with the county rec program." We signed Emma up for a class and it took me back to when I was little. I remember waking up early and getting ready for whatever sport I happened to be playing at that time. I remember my mom and dad blaring music--classics like John Fogerty and Bob Dylan--and making breakfast. I remember being so excited about getting to hang out with my friends.

Truth is I never really thought about what it took to make that happen. As a kid, you're not supposed to. You're not supposed to know that Mom and Dad actually got up an hour before you did because there was just no way they were going to get everything done otherwise. You're not supposed to know what it cost each and every season to play that sport or join that team or do that event. You're just not. I'm so glad that I didn't know those things as a kid; and I'm even more glad I'm getting to learn them now. Because that means my daughter is getting to experience new things and meet new people. She's having fun without worries. That's my job as her mom, her dad's job as her dad. We make things happen for her without her ever knowing what it takes to make them happen.

Anyways. Nostalgia over. Back to present day. As I said, we took Emma to her first class. She didn't really get it at first. Actually, out of the hour the class lasts, she didn't get it for maybe 45 minutes! lol There towards the end though, she got it. After it wrapped up, we went to her great-grandma's house to visit--maybe an hour there. Then we went home. Emma had had so much excitement that she was sleeping soundly before we pulled out of the driveway! HAHA She slept the whole way home. That alone is reason enough to keep going every week: GUARANTEED NAP TIME!

Actually, I know we'll be going back because we asked Emma the other night if she was excited about her "class." She immediately said "YES!" We asked if she wanted to do this thing or that thing from the class. And she actually understood. The things she said yes to were the things she played with most when we were there; the things she said no to were things she did maybe once and then didn't go back to. So she gets it. There were a bunch of other kids around her age, so hopefully this is the start of Emma making new friends before she even starts school! I definitely want her to be comfortable walking into new situations and meeting new people.

Other than that...not a whole lot. Getting back into a routine with the new year. New work schedule means new home schedule. Everyone is making adjustments. Not just me, my guy, and Emma...but our whole family. I love the fact my daughter stays with family. I know I'm lucky. A lot of parents don't have that luxury. And that's what it is: A luxury. My parents didn't have it. My parents lived overseas at one point and then they lived halfway across the country at another time. When we finally stopped moving, they were still no closer than 4hrs from the nearest grandparent. We saw my mom's side kind of frequently, considering--maybe something like once a month or every other month. My dad's side was like 6-7hrs so that was even less often.

Emma doesn't have that. Her family is a stone's throw away. She could see most of them every day if she wanted. The rest she could probably see every other week or maybe once a month or so. The point is my daughter is so incredibly lucky. She gets to see 2 of her grandmas ever single week. And *I* am lucky. Because my daughter is being cared for by people who love her. I don't have to find an outside sitter for her. I know a lot of people have nannies who care for and about their kids. And some parents send their kids to daycare or early preschool; and they choose the best schools with the best teachers. I'm not saying anything against moms/dads who opt for those choices. They may not have the opportunity for family to watch their babies. I'm just lucky that I do.

Parents --good parents, parents who were meant to be parents-- care more about their kids than anything else; we always look for the best options for our babies. We put their needs before our own, their wants before our own. We make our decisions based on them. I may WANT to go see a movie or get my nails done. But my daughter NEEDS me to come home and be with her especially when I've worked 40+hrs that week. I may want to stay up late but my daughter needs me to be up with her in the morning, so I'm in bed before I want to be. (Sometimes, after a gruesomely long day, I want to go to bed before her though! LOL)
My days of being carefree and doing what I want because I want--well those days are over. I am a mom first. And thank goodness for that. At some point every one has to grow up. I see my daughter growing before my eyes and know she is my world. She and her daddy. They are why I work, so I can prove to my daughter that anything she wants is possible. They are why I clean as much possible, so they can be proud of their home. They are why I plan and why I strive, so we can always know how much we mean to each other and how important we all are--individually and as a family.

That is our new adventure: Taking the time to allow Emma to discover things she likes, things she doesn't. And making the time to grow as a family, a couple, a parent, and a person. This year has already been incredible and fun. I am so excited for what the rest of the year holds!

How Long has it been?!?

Forever. Haha

Emma turned 18 months yesterday. It really hit me as I had to say that to someone aloud. My daughter is 18 months old now. I'm still in shock.

She is the most amazing child I have been privied to raise. Haha. Seriously though, she is really just... well words can't describe it. I watch her become a person every day. I see her find things she loves, hates, understands, dismisses... just like the rest of us.

Loves: Well this is easy. Mickey Mouse Clubhouse!!!! (has to be MMCH though. We found out through trial and error no other "Mimi" shows will do.) Chocolate Milk. Pancakes. Kit Kats. Baby dolls. Shoes. Those are the immediate ones. Every day there are more things she discovers and finds that she loves. She got a set of dress up heels for Christmas and now she wants to wear them all the time. IT STARTS! lol
Aside from that: she still likes throwing balls around, playing "catch." She like to do things on her own. She actually will stop eating if I try to feed her and act like she's full, but will come back when I'm not looking to finish eating as long as she can feed herself. She is starting to gravitate to her books. Sometimes I will catch her sitting on her new "Mimi" couch, reading a book while "Mimi" plays on her TV. She is amazing.

Sorry so blurry. It's from my phone and I was kind of far away.

She loves to dance. Sometimes she does this move where she sticks her arm out from her face kinda and sort of prances around or spins... and it is EXACTLY like a home movie my parents have of me at 3 doing the exact same thing. Then you realize she is doing that to her daddy's heavy metal music and you realize: This child is such a perfect combo of her daddy and me. LOL

Hates: Bananas. And mashed potatoes. Seriously. She'll try almost any food. And some of it she won't love. She'll give those a few test bites, but ultimately dribble it out of her mouth. But but one of those to her lips and you will get a big ole "YUCK" from her! haha

She is starting to get potty-trained. She actually does tell us "Mama, potty." "Dada, potty." And will drag us upstairs to the bathroom so she can sit on her little potty and go. Not every time but sometimes. And she gets confused at which is which. But, again, she is only 18 months. She is so smart.

Every day, it seems like, Emma learns a new word or phrase. Just recently she started trying to perfect "Are you Ready?" to where the "R" is noticeable. Aside from that, she seriously has a huge vocabulary and understanding. She doesn't just throw out one or two words and hope you get it. She forms fully functional sentences. Yesteday I turned the faucet off in the tub because it was kind of full. She looked at me and said, "Mama, I want it oooonnnn!" I told her No. She said it again. I said no again. She said "Please?" Melted my heart. Not only because she said please, but because she gets when she is supposed to. She also says "Thank You" when you give her something. Or when she gives you something ("You're welcome hasn't quite taken hold yet! lol)

I tell ya. Watching her grow is the best feeling. Seeing her determine who she will be is scary and fun and scary and wow--all wrapped up in one bright, bubbly, amazing little blonde-haired/blue-eyed perfection. Not every trait she's developing is one I want to see stay (the demanding nature as she enters the terrible two's.. yeah that I could do without). But I know those are things she could outgrow as she gets older. Or they will be quirks she and I can fight over as gets gets older. I'm sure it will be both.

Her Christmas picture

Thanksgiving

After Christmas Pictures #2

 

My little Princess on Halloween

It's been a year already?

Seriously? Someone please tell me how this happened! My baby... Well I don't even  know if I can call her that anymore. She is my LITTLE GIRL! Everything about her amazes me. Everything.

Yesterday I had to work a long day. 12 hours away from her. But it was so I could have today off with her. A whole day off with her on her first birthday. A whole day to spend with her without any work. No emails. No texts. Nothing but her and me time.

Anyways, back to yesterday. So yeah, every time I would look at the clock, I was transported back to exactly one year ago at that time. I kept remembering every thing I was doing at that exact moment one year ago. People tell me it's silly to do that because eventually I won't remember every minute. But I think the reason I was so aware of every minute last year was because I was being induced. I was counting those minutes until we would go to the hospital and I would get to meet my daughter. I told me dad it was different than when he and mom were pregnant with me: They had no clue I would be coming when I did. So they didn't notice all the things that day. But I did "know." Sort of. I knew when I would be heading to the hospital and I knew it would be a few hours after that when she could be here. So yeah, one year ago I was making memories, storing them, because every minute was important to me.

One year ago at 8am I had my last doctor visit. I went to breakfast with my mom and stepdad at Cracker Barrel. I paced the house, cleaning what little I could, waiting for my dad and Grammy to come in. We went to dinner at Texas Roadhouse. We came back to the house where I proceeded to pack and unpack and repack my suitcase probably a good 5 times! I knew I should get some sleep because the next day was going to be a rough one, but I was too excited. We checked in around 11pm. Question and answer session with the nurses. Watched my guy sleep on that crappy fold out. Watched crappy TV (because really, is there ever anything good on at 2am?) At 4:30am on 7/2/13 the doctor came in and broke my water. Epidural at 9am. At 12:25pm I told everyone I was fully dilated. They all laughed at me. I forced my guy to go get the nurse because I was THAT sure. He laughed as he brought her in. She laughed as I told her I was done. She wasn't laughing when she told the assistant nurses to go get the doctor and shoo-ing everyone out of the room. I pushed for almost 2 hours. Then, at 2:12pm, they laid my daughter on my belly. I wanted to hold her so bad, but they took her to clean her up. Her dad looked at me, then at her in the rolling bed, then at me, asking me if I'd mind if.... I told him to go meet our daughter. I don't know how much time passed before people were allowed in, but I remember the room being flooded with people who wanted to see Emma.

That was a year ago and I remember all of it. Like I am watching a home video.

And now. Now my daughter is this little person. She is getting into everything. Here is a little breakdown of the little person ruling my life:

• She's a running fool! She doesn't walk so much as she runs. Last night, as we were playing before bed, I had my phone plugged in to charge. I watched as she unplugged the charger (not like ripped it, but actually unplugged it)... and IMMEDIATELY RAN AWAY! Haha little stinker. She knew what she was doing and when I "ran" after her, she had gone to the bathroom and was waiting for me. She had this HUGE smile on her face when she saw me. Then she ran back to Daddy, laughing the whole way.

• Her vocabulary is huge! Mama (or Mum), Dada (or Dah-DEE), Nonna, Mamaw, Timmy, Shawn, Poppa, No, Pees (Please), Tank Ew (Thank you), Toof-bah-sh (toothbrush), That's mine, I want that, Ball, Ba (bottle), Yuh You (Love You)...

• She loves to open the microwave when it dings that her bottle is warmed. She also loves to close the microwave door.

• She loves when we let her open/close the door, turn the light switches on or off, pull the shower curtain back... She loves being a big kid.

• She only wants to eat what we are eating. Like--what is on our plate. She doesn't want her own plate. She wants OUR plate!

• She loves baby dolls.

• Everything is a phone and every "phone" should play music. She is already Tech-savvy. She can work a phone. She mimics her Daddy with his Playstation remote.

• This kid loves to dance! She can keep the beat of almost anything after just a few seconds of hearing it. She's a genius, at least in my opinion. May have the stuff to be a Prima Ballerina or dance Hip Hop. We're not sure yet! haha

• She likes to "tidy up." She puts her toys in containers...whether or not they are the containers we would put them in doesn't really matter. The other day I found her "stacker" toy sticking up out of the recycling can we have! We find our cell phones in random places. We still can't find the TV remote and it's been missing for almost a month now!

• She's not a huge fan of the pool yet. She has to be held the entire time. Won't go in the sitting-floaty thing we got her. And she HATES when her daddy and uncle rough-house in the pool. 

I'll post again with her "One Year Pics." And some fun stories from her birthday-day!

We have a walker

Yes, I am way way late on posting this. I kept meaning to post the video to YouTube so that I could then put it on here... but I kept forgetting. So here it is:

Emma had been taking some small steps for a while. Like "Step Step Fall." Then she got up to "Step Step Step Fall." We were all excited when we got up to "Step Step Step Step....Step Fall." HAHAH

But then the magical day of May 23rd happened. She was playing in the kitchen. Just standing and playing with my dish towels. Suddenly I looked and she was walking. And still walking. And then walking some more! She walked from our kitchen to the living room without stopping!! I consider that to be the day she really started walking. Because that is the day our lives really changed. Now we have to be on uber-alert because she is on the MOVE!

So here you go. Here is some fun video of the day Emma became an official and bona fide walker!

Catching Up

I know it's been awhile. The thing is, it's getting harder and harder to find the energy to up-date this blog as often. Not just because I am constantly chasing after my toddling 10 month old (YIKES!). No, mostly it's because one of my biggest reasons for keep this blog was so my Pappy could stay up-to-date on Emma. He and my Grammy lived so far away and couldn't get out here much, so I thought having this blog would allow them to keep up with her fun stories and new activities. Now that he's gone, a huge gust of wind has blown my sail right over, toppling me, making me struggle to even view this blog. When I open up my internet, I have 5 "home pages" automatically pop up. This is one of them. Each time is a reminder Pappy isn't here for me to share my stories with anymore. I'd have the whole post mentally prepped out in my mind of what I'm going to write, open the internet, see that tab at the top, and stop. I couldn't force myself to actually click on it to start the post.

Today, when I feel the worst I have felt in as long as I can remember (fever, migraine, sore throat, dizzy, whole body feels like it is shutting down), today is the day I decide to actually bring everyone up to date! haha So here are some fun new moments with Emma.

• She is talking, like a lot! I can never remember what I've already said so here is a list of her vocabulary to date: Mama (more often than not I get called "Mum" though!), Dada, no, uh-oh, again, more, mamaw & nonna, baba, num-num. 
• She knows who people are. She knows I am "Mum," her daddy is "dada," my mom is "mamaw" and her daddy's mom is "nonna." On Easter, her daddy came into her room to get her from her crib. She was playing happily in her crib when she looked up at him and said "OH! Hi Da!" She puts actual sentences together!!
• When I ask if she is hungry she will smack her lips together or start chanting "Num num. Num num." She also knows when the microwave goes off, it more than likely is her bottle and she starts flapping her arms and shrieking.
• She is a speed demon crawler. She can get anywhere now and wants to get there quickly!
• She climbs the stairs. Remind me to thank whomever taught her to do that. Sheesh!
• She is trying to walk. The most she has taken is two consecutive steps. Then she freezes because we are all excited and holding our breath. She gets nervous, plops down, laughs, and then starts crawling to wherever it was she wanted to go. The only bad thing about this whole "trying to walk" thing is she is constantly falling down and bumping her butt on things. She is a little daredevil though and doesn't seem to care. Sometimes she cries, but only because she thinks we will pick her up.
• She throws the ball to where she wants it to go. She picks it up, aims, and throws. Like to a person. Today for example, she aimed right for me and hit me 4 out of 5 times. (The time she missed was because we were all laughing so hard, she started laughing and when she went to throw it her other hand hit it.) I think it was John Cusak in the movie Martian Child where he said "The Professional Baseball players just have to hit 3 out of 10. And if they do just a little better, just a tiny bit better, than they are superstars." Well, I guess my girl is a SUPERSTAR!!! 
• She is such a girly girl. She loves her doll. See, before Christmas, her Nonna and I were at my favorite store and walking down the toy aisle. Emma has NEVER before (and never since) actively reached for a toy I hadn't put in front of her. But that day she saw this little dolly and she was freaking out. So of course we got it for her. She has gotten a few other dolls since then, but she always wants this doll. She goes looking for it in her toy bins in the living room.  
• She also loves stuffed animals. She has a little seahorse that stays in her crib overnight. The other morning, I got her out of her crib and she was clutching her seahorse. I changed her diaper and then went to take her downstairs to play. She still had the seahorse! She gets in these "moods" kind of where she wants a specific toy and that's it.
• Sophia the First. That is her favorite thing right now. I can't believe it since she is only 10 months old, but this girl has chosen Princess Sophia as her favorite thing right now. She has a little doll, some jammies, all kinds of things. I even went ahead and bought her a Princess Sophia Halloween basket. It's really a little Easter basket, but it was on sale for $3 in the after-Easter clearance. 
• She hides things now. We have to be super careful about what we put down and where because she will "clean up" for us. She has hidden her daddy's cell phone in her bouncy ball dino game. She has also hidden his PS4 remotes in there! Then there are our TV and other remotes. She plays with those and then "puts them away" but she doesn't put them away where they are easy to find!! She is a lot like me in that she likes to "clean up." 
• We recently got a shelving system with plastic tubs for her toys. Now she is able to see almost all her toys and decide for herself what she wants to play with. We also have the rubber floor puzzle pieces as a playmat in the living room. So now she will go, grab a toy, and take it back to the mat to play with it! I have taught her well!!!
• She shakes her head No. 
• She waves hi and bye on command. Her doctor told me she is actually really advanced in that regard. They told me usually babies wave just because they have learned how. They don't normally understand "bye bye" and wave on command until almost 15 months.
• She dances!! When she learned to stand on her own, she also learned she could dance!! She kind of looks like a mix between Elvis and a bird! She pulls her shoulders back, cocks her elbows, pulls her arms back and bounces. Sometimes she puts one arm above her head and bounces. Sometimes she squats a little, sticks one leg in front of her, and bounces that way. 
• She loves the Talking Tomcat app. Every time I  click on it, she smiles really big and starts laughing. She is such a whiz with the phone in general!

Okay, that is it for now. Maybe I'll get back into this sooner rather than later. But it really is hard. It's hard to know these stories aren't going to be read by so many people who loved us and waited so long to meet Emma. People who wanted her as much as I did. I'll get better. I know it. It's just a LOT harder than I thought it would be.

Emma's 9 Month Pics

Emma's 9 Month/ Easter/ Spring pictures. She was such a good girl. Such a BIG girl!! It was such a hassle dealing with the company we went through, but at least we have some cute pictures to take away with us. I think that has more to do with my adorable daughter than the skill level of the photographer, but oh well!!